APIAS Interviews The Rickey


Little Rickey Is Happy

Little Rickey Is Happy

Talk about hitting the jackpot.  APIAS scored the biggest interview of the day when Rickey Henderson decided to talk to us on a strictly first name basis.  We drew straws to see who would interview The Man and lo and behold resident A’s fan eDayStat lucked out and got the chance to talk with Mr. Henderson.  Here’s the transcript from their discussion.


eDay: Mr. Henderson…

Rickey: Please, call Rickey Rickey son.

eDay: Yes, sir…er, Rickey I mean.  Rickey, how do you feel about being elected to the baseball Hall of Fame.

Rickey: First things first, you tell Selig and the GM’s of every MLB team that Rickey is still ready to play.  Rickey wants to be the first player to be in the Hall of Fame and play in the Majors at the same time.  If Bud doesn’t like it, Rickey doesn’t care.  Rickey can still play and you tell Bud he can stick it.

eDay: Whoa!  Easy Rickey, we don’t want to get you thrown out of the Hall before you get there.

Rickey: Thrown out?  Those punk ass catchers never threw Rickey out; no punk ass Commissioner is gonna throw Rickey out!

eDay: Moving on…How do you feel about getting 94.8 percent of the available vote?  That’s a heck of a number considering the second highest vote count this year was 76.4 percent for Jim Rice.

Rickey: 94.8 percent is a joke!  Those 27 fools who didn’t vote for Rickey, they can go *@(! their mommas!

eDay: Rickey!  This is a familiy site!  Pft…Pffffft…Ahahahaha!  Who the fuck are we kidding here?  Say what you want brother.  Stick it to Selig all you want.

Rickey: Rickey’s over that.  Rickey loves him some Rickey.  Rickey doesn’t need to have to any hate for anybody right now.  Even those 27 cock suck…

eDay: Easy Rickey, that word got you thrown from 32 games in your career.  It could get you tossed from the Hall too.

Rickey: Listen, Rickey calls cock suckers as he sees ’em.  You cock sucker…

eDay: Easy Woo.  Let’s steer this thing back on track.  What will you say at your inaguration.

Rickey: Rickey’s gonna lay it on real thick and heavy like.  Rickey’s gonna tell about when he was 7 and got smacked around by his Poppa.  Rickey’s gonna talk about when he was 13 and this chick touched Little Rickey.  Rickey’s gonna talk about when he made pro ball at 18 and when he made it again at 81. 

eDay: So you’re going to let things come full circle.

Rickey: Full circle, like a Dunkin’ Doughnuts Hooker.  You seen the things they can do?

eDay:  And we’re done…


One Response to “APIAS Interviews The Rickey”

  1. TheGoldfishCowboy Says:

    I bet Rickey never had a beer with Nick Swisher’s dad

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