APIAS Pickem Scramble Week 7: Ofer potential

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Okay okay, I’m back.  Never fear.  I shan’t be leaving my child alone again to go marry off a friend.  We’ve had an interesting couple of weeks, with Holly performing far above her normal picking rate, smoothron having a subpar year against the spread, and eDay continuing his normal straight-up dominance.

If you missed us this week, we got all pseudo-politico on you, previewed this weekend at the fabled Land of Keene, and introduced you to the second rapping member of the 2008 Basketvols.

This week brings us the potential for many many more good football games than we’ve seen perhaps in the prior six weeks combined.  Which also, brings the potential for one of our panel to go ofer (I’m looking at you Bru) for the first time in SPS history.  Fingers crossed.

If you need me on Saturday, I’ll be in one of the following places.  Outside turn 4 tailgating.  Beer line.  Julep line. Burgoo line. TSH betting line. So I’ll meet you BY THE CLOCK!

On to this week’s games.

HOMERS

AWAYERS

This week’s best from the Aristocracy.

Clemson @ Wake Forest
Clemson is setting a new standard for underachieving this season. Maybe, just maybe, #9 might have been a tad high for a preseason ranking? – Bru
How come I’ve never heard of Wake’s football stadium? I have no idea where they play, so it can’t be that menacing. Clemson wins on the road. – xp
While I know not what a Demon Decon is, the Tigers of South Carolina suck. -eday
Wake.  Why?  Because FUCK Clemson, that’s why.  -Holly

South Carolina @ Kentucky
South Carolina, and I wish they’d play a weaker schedule so we’d see more of EDSBS folk hero Stephen Garcia.  -Holly
DLJ over OBC any day.-eday
South Caromida (muttled under breath) Seriously? You’re having UK fans actually pick this game, knowing we haven’t EVER beaten Spurrier, even though we should have at least 3 times in the past 5 years (cough, UT, cough) and should beat them again this year, but probably won’t happen? How dare you, TGC. -The W
Cats struggle against Spurrier, but this Carolina team is bad. UK’s offense is also bad, but drunken fan support at Commonwealth make up the difference here. – Bru
 Turn the stands blue, faithful wildcats. Kentucky wins – xp

Colorado @ Kansas
FEAR THE BUFFALO, and an angry Dan Hawkins, brah.  -Holly
This is Division 1 football!! It’s the Big 12.!! My team is not very good!! – Bru
 I sloagged Wake above, but Kansas is even worse. Nobody gives a crap about Memorial Stadium, which is an ancient concrete behemoth. Get some new facilities, and the Kansas reign is officially on. Oh, and we have no running game. Colorado wins – xp
Jaba the Ball Coach takes it this weekend.-eday
Kansas. Although a close one, KU pulls it out when Mangino finally wolfs down that last donut.-The W

Vanderbilt @ Mississippi State
Vandy. Trap game? The only thing trapped in this game is MSU having an extended contract with Sly Croom. – The W
Vandy. I don’t know why – xp
Smart kids continue to astound.-eday
Vandy.  Let them go undefeated until the V-O-L-S roll into town (for what will be our only conference win).  -Holly

Notre Dame @ North Carolina
I like this one to go Carolina Blue. I’m calling for five Notre Dame turnovers in this one – xp
Notre Dame. In what seems to be a recurring theme picking with/against the Irish, this is my weekly coin toss game, in which yet again, ND wins. -The W
Please stop putting Notre Dame games on here. I’m begging. I don’t care if they’re playing Tates Creek Middle, I will not ever pick them – Bru

Tennessee @ Georgia
Georgia.  I don’t wanna talk about it.  -Holly
See, T. Kyle dropped out way too soon. He would have enjoyed this. Dawgs – xp.
UGA, because UT couldn’t score with 2SL running game for them at the prom, or if they were running against TGC’s arm. – The W
Arian Foster has been the Vols running back for close to 11 seasons now, and even he’s never seen an offense this inept – Bru
While I think Phil will find a way to do this and cause everyone to sit on the fence again this year, Georgia is just plain better.-eday

Arkansas @ Auburn
Auburn. The Tigers win this coaching suckfest- The W
I’m going to throw in a shoutout to my backwoods hillbilly relations and call this one for Arkansas. – xp
Good thing they brought in Tony Franklin to fix the offense – that worked out well for everyone – Bru
I’ll take the Tigers, who suck slightly less, out of the state of Alabama.-eday

LSU @ Florida
Florida, but only because it’s in Gainesville.  -Holly
At the Swamp, only reason I’m picking the Gators over the Tigers of Louisiana.-eday
LSU. Apparently, they have signed John Conner just for this week’s game. – The W
It would be a shame if a Florida offensive lineman delivered a cut-block to Ricky Jean-Francois’ leg and injured him. But hey, LSU has a medical staff – Bru
Oohh. Something deep inside says this one geauxs to the Tigers. It may just be lunch repeating on me. – xp

Penn State @ Wisconsin
PSU, although JoePa gets confused bc he doesn’t know what a badger is and then shits himself. – The W
Assuming they’re able to bail everyone out of jail before kickoff – Bru
Wisconsin, for this reason and this alone:  I am so goddamn sick of having to write about Penn State so much this year, and I want them to lose so I don’t have to come up with any more tidbits to make their program sound interesting.  Bring back Morelli!  -Holly
I think Penn State plays better with Joe Pa in the box. Give him some cheese curds and an adult diaper, and PSU wins this in a cake walk – xp
Joe Pa gets confused and continues to have his boys put up 40+.-eday

UCLA @ Oregon
Oregon. Ducks fly together! And because UCLA is horrible. – The W
The Ducks roar to victory here. Well, not roar, because ducks don’t actually roar. I guess they really just quack, but that doesn’t sound as impressive. We’ll stick with roar – Bru
The state of Oregon is frisky this year. Must be on account of they got no sales tax up there. Ducks. – xp
quack.  Quack.  QUack.  QUAck.  QUACk.  QUACK! QUACK! QUACK!-eday

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7 Responses to “APIAS Pickem Scramble Week 7: Ofer potential”

  1. TheGoldfishCowboy Says:

    backwoods hillbilly relations

    isn’t that what got Arkansas into this mess?

  2. Holly Says:

    I kinda love you for picking our boys.

  3. smoothron Says:

    I take my punishment as no comments for this week. Apologies again.

    Also, Tates Creek Middle’s team is really good, Bru.

  4. Extra P Says:

    I actually do have family, born in respectable states of the union, who voluntarily live in Arkansas. We don’t speak.

  5. Sir Richard Says:

    I never get shite posted. what the fuck? am i too edgy?!?!

  6. Holly Says:

    As far as my “normal” picking acumen…see the Wisconsin pick above. It’s happening later than last year, but where I generally run into trouble is when I start picking games out of pure spite.

  7. eDayStat Says:

    Quickly adding them up for the week. Forgive any miscalculations and I didn’t check the e-mail list to see if Burnsy and Spanklin got their other pics in yesterday. TGC will have the full update this week some time. Bru and Smooth take honors this week with 8 (EIGHT!) each, Eric is the only one to pick Arkansas to win, and Holly is the only one who picked Penn St. to lose. Enjoy.

    TGC: 4
    eDay: 7
    smooth: 8
    2SL: 7
    BW: 6
    Bru: 8
    The W: 5

    Holly: 6
    EP: 5
    Matt Jones: 7
    Burnsy: 0
    Peter Bean: 4
    Spankline: 0
    Sir Richard: 5

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