FYCFP: The Time Has Come

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Typically, I write FWP on Fridays predicting what will transpire over the weekend.  I am stepping things up and am going out on a limb to predict what is going to happen this year in college football.  If you’ve spent any time around this site, you know we are huge college football fans and love the four months over which it spans.  What’s not to love about the upcoming football season?  There are no less than eight teams with legitimate national title hopes and a bunch of guys gunning for the Heisman Trophy.  Who will come out on top?  Let’s find out…

  • The preseason #1 team in the country (Georgia) will not finish the season at the same place.  Hey, the talent that Georgia has is second to none.  Matt Stafford at QB is solid and the Moreno kid at RB is just nasty.  They were playing as good as anyone in the country at the end of last year, but their schedule is ridiculous.  They play at South Carolina (rivalry game), at #15 Arizona St., #24 Alabama, at #7 LSU, #5 Florida in Jacksonville and at #10 Auburn.  That’s a damn gauntlet, but that’s the curse of playing in the SEC.  If Richt can get double-digit wins with that schedule, he should get a medal.
  • Mark Mangino will eat more doughnuts than could fit in Memorial Stadium.  Yes, for those of you know didn’t know (I had to Wiki it), the Jayhawks play at Memorial Stadium.  Mangino is a favorite around the site, because of his mammoth size.  What a fat bastard!  The Jayhawks were a one-hit wonder last year and I look for them to plummet quickly back to Earth.  This will cause Adidas to make the largest pullover in history as Mangino copes by investing even more money in Krispy Kreme.
  • The winner of the Ohio State/USC game on September 13 will play in the national championship.  I love the fact that these teams are playing this game.  Neither team is scared to play a big game early in the year.  Ohio State has played a home-and-home with Texas in the last few years and USC had one with Nebraska.  Both teams play in conferences which are subpar, so the winner is in the driver’s seat to the title game.  If Ohio State is that winner (which I think they will be), the entire country may vomit if they have to watch them play in the national championship game again.

  • Kentucky will struggle mightily with Mike Hartline at QB.  I don’t dislike the Football Wildcats, but even though I went to UK I’m not a fan.  From an outside perspective, I see them not scoring the ball very often.  Their offense was very good last year, but they lost almost every skill player that mattered, save Dicky Lyons Jr.  The eccentric WR will try and help an offense that could really have a hard go of it in 2008.  I’d love to be in Nashville again partying (not paying $40 to go into a bar this year, though) on New Year’s, but a bowl seems like quite a stretch for this group of Cats.
  • Clemson, like always, will wilt under high expectations.  They brought in a boat load of good recruits, have a veteran QB and two of the best RBs in the country.  Everyone picks them to win the ACC hands down… this sounds like something Tommy Bowden can absolutely screw up!  He’s terrible and is obviously cheating to keep getting these freshmen to keep coming.  Clemson doesn’t even get to the ACC Championship.  They will still have the hottest blonde conglomeration in the South, though.
  • Rich Rodriguez will exceed expectations at Michigan.  As a Wolverine fan, I don’t hold a lot of hope for this year.  The offensive cupboard is pretty bare after Lloyd Carr was asleep on the job for the past couple years.  There’s still no clear-cut favorite to start at QB, only one proven WR and not a lot there in terms of RB.  This totally sounds like a team that could win 8 games.  Winning as many games as they won last year would be a miracle, but it will happen.  UM will beat some teams they’re not supposed to, but still not at Ohio State level this year.  A bowl game is definitely in their sights.
  • The Big XII North will be a joke.  I’m not sold on any team in the division.  Already said that I think Kansas is back to reality and Missouri is on the same course.  Colorado is still a year away under fratty Dan Hawkins as is Nebraska with Bo Pellini.  Kansas State and Iowa State are many years away.  What a damn joke.  Missouri goes 8-4, Kansas about the same and no other team even close.  Missouri or Kansas may play in the Big XII Championship, but they will get absolutely smoked by Oklahoma.
  • LSU’s defense will be just as nasty as they were last year.  Last fall, when I may had been under the influence of a beer or two, I said that Ryan Perilloux would win the Heisman before he graduated.  Well, the fact that he liked to smoke pot and skip class kind of killed that one for me.  It also killed LSU’s chances of repeating as national champions.  They put a ton of guys in the NFL, but still have athletes for days.  Jean Francois is a name to remember, and he is not French.
  • Miami will be the surprise team in all of college football.  I never would have thought to have say that two years ago when Larry Coker was running the program into the ground, but Randy Shannon has breathed new life into the program.  They brought in a bunch of talent from the ridiculous state of Florida (I’m talking football players, not blonde girls) and always have athletes on the field.  It will be a lot closer than any Gator fan will want in Week 2.  They will be good and if Robert Marve can get his head out of his ass, they may win the ACC.
  • The Big East will provide fewer than three watchable games all year.  West Virginia is the only team worth watching in the whole conference.  Even still, they aren’t that good.  Auburn is going to roll in to Morgantown and beat that ass.  Hopefully, the Mountaineers aren’t anywhere close to being in the national championship hunt… oh, hell, like it matters.  They’ll blow it again, just like last year.
  • Percy Harvin will be the fastest man in the country.  Olympians or not, I’ll take Harvin versus anybody.  He’ll be the utility man for a Florida team that will win the SEC.  He can run, catch and even lines up at QB on occasion.  Check him out this year, because he probably won’t be around next year.
  • The SEC will again be the class of college football.  They’ll put more teams in bowls than any other conference, will put a team in the national championship (for the third year in a row) and have the best coaches far and away in the country.  Tommy Tuberville has an undefeated season under his belt and may be in the bottom half of the coaches. 
  • Erin Andrews will be sexy.  She is usually the best part of the day, unless my six-team parlay hits.  She is a goddess.
  • Chris Wells will win the Heisman.  He’ll be the best player on the best team and the media will be leery to vote Tebow again (unless his stats are out of control).  If the Buckeyes go undefeated, it’s guaranteed.  Also, let’s all remember that his name is CHRIS.  It’s is NOT Beanie.  Glad we got that cleared up.
  • Florida will beat Ohio State (again) in the national championship.  That’s the best I can come up with.  Florida will be the best team in the best conference and Ohio State will most likely be undefeated.  It happened two years ago and America will collectively throw up watching the Bucks lose again.  That may be just the thing we need to have happen to insure some sort of tournament in the coming years.

There you have it.  I didn’t mention all the beer that this site will drink each weekend because that’s just too obvious.  I also won’t mention all the money I’ll lose betting on games, because that’s just so predictable.  I did mention Erin Andrews, however, to put that picture up.

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One Response to “FYCFP: The Time Has Come”

  1. TheGoldfishCowboy Says:

    Nice calls oh smooth one. Very nice indeed. Now if we could only get those futures bets to cooperate.

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